School Social Work Newsletter - Winter 2016-17

Winter 2016-17

Managing Stress as a Family

By Liz Mathews-Jolley

Managing daily demands any time of year can be difficult, but during the winter, the joy of holiday celebrations and the extended school break can be even more stressful.  Time spent traveling or hosting family members, managing the holiday to-do list, and keeping the kids busy during the colder, shorter days are often challenging to juggle.  Taking steps to handle the stress will model healthy habits for children and set a strong foundation for coping should a family crisis occur.   We know that children often model parents’ behavior and this includes how parents react to stress.  It is important for parents to reflect on how they manage stress and find ways to break unhealthy habits.

Carving out time to spend quality time together as a family is very difficult in the busy life of a family, but this quality time is a chance to have necessary conversations, to check in with each family member about the good things in their life, and discuss any worries or concerns they may be feeling.  Encouraging time to talk with each other and modeling good conversational techniques helps children feel safe to share their feelings.  Consider doing a household chore together, eating as many meals as possible together (without distractions of electronics such as cell phones and television), a car trip or family exercise such as a hike in nature or just a walk around the block.  Scheduling this time into your family calendar just as you would schedule any other appointment will help make sure you find the time to include these opportunities. 

For families with younger children, play time is important to help children work through feelings and begin life-long path to managing stress in a positive way.  Check out Laura Thieman’s article: Play:  It’s Academic and Stress-Relieving

Tips for Managing Holiday Stress

By Christine Healy

We are all likely to encounter some degree of stress this time of year, and the following strategies can help minimize the impact it has on you and your family:

Plan ahead. Set aside specific days for shopping, cooking, visiting friends, etc.  Make lists to help you remember what you need to do. Start making plans now and pace yourself. Remember…our children are always watching what we do so when you demonstrate good time management skills, your child learns to do the same.

Set a budget and stick to it.  Lack of money is one of the biggest causes of stress.  This year, set a budget, and don't spend more than you've planned.

Maintain your household routines. Children do best when they know what to expect, and this is especially true during times of heightened stress. Try to maintain the schedule you have in place for mealtime, bedtime, etc.

Include your child in holiday planning.  For example, invite your child to bake cookies with you and ask what kind they’d like to make.  Allowing your child to have choices and make some decisions gives them a sense of control which can go a long way in managing stress.

Focus more on “spending time” and less on spending money.  Arrange time for you and your family to do volunteer work together.  Help your child make gifts (paint a picture, make a card, etc.) for the special people in their lives.  Make time at the end of each day to read with your child, listen to music, or just cuddle.

Discuss what makes us thankful, grateful, and happy.  Take time to reflect with your child. Discuss what is important to you and find out what is important to them.

From Your Leadership

By Mary Jo Davis and Carrie Mendelsohn

The holidays provide opportunities for giving and being thankful for even the simplest things that we often take for granted.  We are so appreciative of the support that our staff are providing to their school communities on a daily basis!  And, given that the theme of this newsletter is self-care and stress management, we’d like to encourage everyone to enjoy the upcoming winter break and to always make time for opportunities to rest and rejuvenate.

Play:  It’s Academic and Stress Relieving

By Laura Thieman

“Ready…Set….JUMP!”  I was about 5.  The kids in my neighborhood worked for an hour making the leaf pile bigger than life itself.  Finally, the magical moment had arrived.  We took turns jumping into the pile of leaves with glee and delight, coming up giggling, with leaf-covered hair and clothing—ready for another go.”

“Play is like oxygen,” says play researcher and psychiatrist, Stewart Brown, who has dedicated his career to championing the transformative role of play throughout the lifespan.   Researchers have discovered play is a vital element of life for both animals and people.  Play is correlated with reduced levels of stress as evidenced by lower levels of cortisol.  Increased levels of dopamine, critical for healthy brain functioning, have also been linked in studies to the presence of play.   “The conditions of play—the generation of signals that enhance learning without an accompanying stress response—allow the brain to explore possibilities and to learn from them”  (Wang & Aamodth, 2012).  The right dose of play provides a type of nutrition for us, no matter our age—fueling critical thinking, social skills, new connections, problem-solving, and stress reduction to name a few benefits.

One father taught me a powerful lesson about play and academics.   He noticed his child dreaded reading and would do anything to avoid it.   One day, he tried something new.   Every few pages, he did some rough-and-tumble play with his child, who was a very active and energetic 6-year-old.  Then, they would sit back on the couch and read some more.  Soon, his son began to run to him with books—“Dad, dad!  Time to read!”  Through his relationship-building, playful moments with his son, the dad brought new and positive associations to an old area of struggle. 

What is one of your favorite playful memories from your own childhood? 

Winter break offers more unstructured time with family and friends and is full of opportunities to cultivate play.  Here are a few playful tools to add to the toolbox:  

Rediscover Simple Toys: These include cups, scarves, boxes, pans, blankets and balls. A box may become anything a child wants it to be, from a car, to a suitcase, to a treasure chest. Adults can encourage a child’s freedom by being attentive to the meaning a child brings to an item, as simple as a ball or as complex as an abstract piece of artwork. The freedom to create by turning something (the box) into something else (the treasure chest) is a wonderful example of the power of play and how it supports brain development and the growth of creativity.

Take a Few Moments to Follow Your Child’s Lead: Most of the time, children follow the lead of adults in their lives--for ex-ample, their parents, teachers, and coaches. But play is a child’s world, where the toys are like their words and their play is like their language. Join them at their level and give them your undivided attention, even if only for 5 minutes. Hold off on questions just for these few minutes and simply notice. "Listen" with your eyes, and share what you see and hear from time to time: "You are really zoooooming that fast!" Take note of any emotions: "That guy seems mad!" Your goal is to let your child show you their world as they are ready.

Be a Playful Leader: Blow up a balloon and work together as a team to keep it in the air. Up the challenge by using your el-bows or head or knees to tap the balloon. Make "together" challenges by trying to set a new family record. The more giggling the better.

Bubble Super Powers: Blow bubbles with your kids as a calming ritual. Notice that as you concentrate on blowing bigger bub-bles, your breath slows down. In contrast, if your breath is shallow, you blow more and smaller bubbles. You can teach chil-dren slower, diaphragmatic breathing using bubbles by allowing them to "see" the size of their breath.

References

The Association for Play Therapy,  www.a4pt.org

Brown, Stuart, M.D. (2009). Play:  How it Shapes the Brain, Opens the Imagination, and Invigorates the Soul. London, England: Penguin Books.

Brown, Stuart, M.D.  (2008, May). Play Is More Than Just Fun. [Video File]. Retrieved from  https://www.ted.com/talks/stuart_brown_says_play_is_more_than_fun_it_s_vital?language=en

Association for Play Therapy. (2016, February 17). Introducing Andrew. [Video File]. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=reJpo-GaopM

Lahey, Jessica. (2014, June 20). Why Free Play is the Best Summer School.  The Atlantic, Retrieved from http://www.theatlantic.com/education/archive/2014/06/for-better-school-results-clear-the-schedule-and-let-kids-play/373144/?utm_source=atlfb

Landreth, Garry L. (2002). Play Therapy the Art of the Relationship. New York, NY: Brunner-Routledge.

The National Institute for Play  http://www.nifplay.org/

Rolighetsteorin. (2009, October 7). Piano Stairs—TheFunTheory.com. [Video File]. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2lXh2n0aPyw

Wang, Sam and Aamodth, Sandra.  (2012, September 24). Play, Stress, and the Learning Brain. Retrieved from http://dana.org/Cerebrum/2012/Play,_Stress,_and_the_Learning_Brain/  

What’s in Your Self-Care Toolbox?!

By Angie Huber

Self care is so important. When you take time to replenish your spirit, it allows you to serve others from the overflow.  You cannot serve from an empty vessel. ~ Eleanor Brown

We tend to take care of others day in and day out and do not always think of ourselves. Remember the old saying, “If you don’t take care of yourself, it will get to the point when you will not have much left to give.” Self-care is crucial to staying physically and emotionally healthy, yet it is the first thing to be sacrified because we often mistaken it for being self-indulgent.

To prevent burnout and to stay effective and productive, remember to make time for self-care in your daily routine. This includes activities that benefit all domains of your life:  physical and psychological health, emotional and spiritual needs, and relationships. 

How are you doing with making time for self-care in your daily routine?

What’s getting in the way of you being kind to yourself? 

• Too busy being the perfect parent, friend, sister or brother, son or daughter, work colleague, employee, boss…?
• Too busy taking care of others rather than yourself?
• Your boundaries slowly slipping as you take on far too much to please others?
• And yet you still manage to find time to feel bad that you’re feeling bad? 

Helping Yourself Along The Way...

How Do You Know If You Need a Self-Care Plan?

http://jillconyers.com/2016/10/do-you-you-need-a-self-care-plan/

A Self-Care Revolution

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sUKKJapwUXc

12 Powerful Self-Care Tools That You Can’t Live Without

http://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifestyle/12-powerful-self-care-tools-that-you-cant-live-without.html

Things to Do When You’re Feeling Down

http://www.lovethispic.com/image/180908/things-to-do-when-you%E2%80%99re-feeling-down

25 Ways to Develop a Growth Mindset

http://www.opencolleges.edu.au/informed/motivation/develop-a-growth-mindset/

15 Things Mindful People Do Differently

http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/15-things-mindful-people-differently.html

100 Things to  Do for Improved Self-Care and Wellbeing

http://www.rosalilium.com/

Trauma 101: FCPS Social Workers Promote Trauma Awareness

By Barbara Fisher

One in every four American children will experience at least one traumatic event by the age of 16. A child's reactions to trauma can interfere considerably with learning and behavior at school.  Teams of FCPS school social workers and psychologists are helping FCPS to become a trauma informed school system as they are available to present a 90-minute Trauma 101 training to all requesting FCPS school faculty and staff.  Trauma 101 was developed in collaboration with the Fairfax County Trauma Informed Community Network (TICN).  The goal of Trauma 101 is to reduce the impact of trauma on children by training staff to recognize trauma responses, accommodate and respond to traumatized students within the classroom setting, and know when and how to refer children to school based clinicians and outside professionals when necessary.  Trainings this fall 2016 have taken place at a number of schools, such as Rolling Valley ES, Lynbrook ES and Halley ES, as well as Interagency Alternative School staff and the Wellness Conference.  The FCPS Social Work Trauma 101 training team members include: Marcie Cohen, Katie Basinski, Kari Buttera, Sarah Higgins, Pat Humphrey, Salima Jiwa, Felicea Meyer-Deloatch, Laura Thieman, Julie Tripmacher and Kanika Young.

School teams may request this training by contacting Barbara Fisher, Senior Social Worker, or Terry Aliabadi, Senior Psychologist. 

Social Work Services